irumeur...
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irumeur…

We all have a story -so don’t be frightened of yours. The past does not have to be today -but it will give today a disease, if we stay in it.

It took me years, to figure out I’m not the only one with a sad story.  I needed people to rush to my side, and make everything okay.  Truth is, they can’t make it all okay.  We have to dig deep within ourselves and figure it all out.

That doesn’t mean other people can’t offer kind words, or have empathy -but it is us alone, that must find the peace our past will give us -once we accept it.

Life was just not designed to be easy.  Each time you see someone, who you believe has everything handed to them -see inside them.  What are they lacking to receive -that you’ve not yet noticed?  Trust me, they have a story.  Maybe they are just better at hiding it.

It could be a gentler story, than your own, but many will be difficult to hear.  Yes, even I, as old as I am, still dream of that perfect childhood, or the “what if’s” that I had always wanted in my life.  It’s over -it is the past -we cannot change it.  It’s time to move on!

I share my stories to help offer strength to those afflicted.  I am not perfect.  I still shed a tear, on very rare occasions, over my past, but I’ve done the ground work to being happy and healthy.  I know how hard I fought for me.  I’m asking each of you to fight for yourselves.  Never give up.  Never believe you have to lie in this putrid puddle of vomited pain, forever.

At times, when life is beating me up -it is easy to be swallowed by old emotions.  Why?  Because, it feels safe.  Yes, I did say something as stupid as that.  Listen to me for just a second.  We do things because there is a payoff -or we wouldn’t do them.

You feel safe in your depression.  It is easier to be there, than to walk through life without it.  So, when things get tough, you fall apart because it is safe.

When you remember that everyone around you is also fighting for their lives, fighting to hold it together, working to be whole -how can we allow ourselves to fold?  When we love someone -we must, I think…try, for them, to accept our role in the world.

 

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I am a mother of 16 children and grandchildren. Some of them are by blood and the rest by heart. I was a foster mom for a few years and the children I cared for during that time have mostly stayed with me through the years. I love to write, read, dance, paint, and play with my animals. I enjoy dressage riding and just being in the barn. My words are my gift, as they allow you to know me as I really am. Thanks for joining me on this ride of life!

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